I give up

Being a mom full-time is HARD. I don’t think I should complain at all – I have a good, healthly, fun little girl. But it is still really hard and I feel like I am on the verge of a breakdown these last 3 weeks.
We have been pretty anti-schedule, but now Abi seems to thrive on one. Gotta have a nap at 10. Gotta have a nap at 2. Gotta go to bed at 7. I still have work – and if you know me well, you know I also need 3 things to be happy and functional: time to pray, lots of exercise, and lots of food. Sleep is pretty much optional, but a nice addition as well. I can’t figure out how to get all this into one day, keep the house from being a wreck, keep clothes clean, play and talk to my daughter, be a wife to Wes, send out Christmas cards and presents, and keep the dog from going insane. HELP! WORKING FULL-TIME WAS SO MUCH EASIER!!
The more I try to do outside of the house, if it involves driving more than 10 minutes, the worse the day gets. I just don’t know what to do. My only thought is to just get more vigilant about Abi’s new self-set schedule so that she is happy and alert the rest of the day.
Abi is napping now, so I am going to go make the most of it while I can and hope that I have a happy little almost-toddler on my hands when she wakes up!


4 responses to “I give up

  1. I know what you mean, it was the same when I raised you and your sister. I didn’t even have a car, and I had left a job with 250 employees to stay home with you. As a Mom, you just have to re-prioritize your day. If you manage to maintain your health and the baby’s health, and see your husband that day, you’ve had a successful day! If you manage to do laundry, make dinner, and smile, you’ve had an extremely productive day!

  2. Here, here – it IS hard! You’re definitely not alone in any of it. Don’t be afraid to ask for help – I’m here if you need a few minutes to get out of the house on your own, or even if you just need an ear to vent to. *hugs*

  3. The funny thing, when you ask Abi in 20 years, she’ll just remember having the best childhood ever, and being very happy. You’re doing a great job in the way that matters most. When the house was teeming with kids I was always acutely aware of the things I wasn’t getting done, but I was (often) the only one fretting, and we always find time for the most important things. It’s tough when we don’t have time to get things squared away according to our own personal standards, but … the important thing is you’re showing up every day, being a good mom and wife. As Garrison Keillor said, life is what happens when you’re getting ready (the important little things happen when you’re really focused on some other “big” objective, and you just need to be aware and present). All that said, I wouldn’t trade places with you – it’s too hard!

    My suggestion – just dig a pit in the back and bury one load of laundry a week. It’s a big time saver.

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